Has it Really Been 20 Years?


Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. (John 13:5 ESV)

Today marks my twentieth wedding anniversary. It’s hard to believe it’s been that long. Time flies when you’re living life. It’s been a wild ride and I wouldn’t give it up for anything. Over the years, I’ve learned a few lessons I’d like to share with you.


  • Always pray.  

Whether you pray together or separately, always pray. I know some couples who pray together every day. Sometimes that happens for us, most times we pray separately. The point is, pray for each other. A heartfelt prayer is the greatest gift you can give your spouse.

  • Use your words carefully.  

I sadly remember our first fight. I used words as a weapon to hurt the one I claimed to love. I remember thinking, what if those were the last words he ever heard from me? Carefully chosen words can make a tremendous difference in a marriage.

  • We are on the same team. 

The temptation to place blame increases during difficult circumstances. Life is hard but remembering you are in this together makes you stronger. The enemy will tempt you to accuse but resist. He knows he is defeated when you stand together.

  • Always ask for forgiveness. 

I have always found it easier to forgive someone who asks for it. So, whether it was intentional or not, I ask for forgiveness. He deserves to know I’m sorry and I have to be humble enough to ask for it. 

It’s hard to believe it’s been twenty years. These lessons seem easy and obvious but they were all things I’ve learned along the way. I’m sure over the next twenty years (Lord willing) I will have another set of lessons. The bottom line for me has been learning to put my husband before myself. I think that’s what Jesus was trying to teach his disciples by washing their feet. However, I learned to be a servant by my husband’s example.

Happy Anniversary Honey!!