Trusting God When We Fear

God Has A Reason

(Photo credit: jubileelewis)

I spent the morning in the doctor’s office with Jonah today. It was a routine check up for his asthma. They had overbooked appointments leaving us with a long waiting time. Jonah and I have had some of our best talks waiting for doctors. With his ailments, we have spent literally hours waiting on doctors. Rather than sit and become irritated, I use this time to have mother-son talks. There are no other siblings around to hear us and nothing to distract us. This morning we talked about the upcoming school year. Lately, he’s been expressing wishes to go to the same Christian school as his siblings. I know it’s only because he feels safe there. However, he had decided several months ago he wanted to attend public middle school. And because of his interests, we agreed it would be a better fit for him. Still, not knowing what to expect has him a bit nervous.

So today, I gave him a pep talk. I told him he would be bored at the Christian school because it wasn’t as diverse as his school. I mean he’ll be able to learn video game designing. What 11 year old boy doesn’t love that? And music is in that boy. Yesterday he likened the thunder to a bass. Who does that? He speaks two languages; music and video games, neither of which I understand. I took three years of Spanish!

Jonah is so very different from his siblings. He has never followed directions well and longs to step over that proverbial line just to see what will happen. And he’s not afraid to try anything new. I love that about him. He may be nervous, but he always goes for it. I know in my heart, I can’t approach parenting with him as I do with the others. He’s just different.

As I sit here and write this a couple of things come to mind. First, I’m glad the Lord filled me with patience this morning waiting in the doctor’s office. Had we been rushed or decided to have a bad attitude, we would never have had the opportunity to talk. (Yes, I’m smiling. I know how impatient I am!) Sometimes I’m so quick to get on my high horse suggesting my time is more valuable than sitting in a waiting room. I mean I have things to do. Waiting is not productive, unless of course, the Lord intervenes.

And secondly, I realized once again, the Lord treats us as individuals. We all have different needs, wants and gifts. Jonah’s interests will be best served at public school. Sure it would calm my nerves to have him where I think he will be safe. But as time passes, I am realizing more and more that God doesn’t call us to a safe life. He calls us to step out in faith. There are many times we ignore His promptings because of fear. And yes, I’m afraid. I can’t let Jonah see that. I have to let God do His thing in Jonah’s heart. I’m excited to see how He grows my boy this year.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight. (Prov. 3:5-6 NASB)

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